I didn’t mean to watch Conan this week.  I was on a business trip to Indianapolis, and I couldn’t sleep. At 3am, I found the IFC channel playing Conan the Barbarian. Since it’s been a while since I’ve watched it and sleep wasn’t an option, I settled in. Pulp is hard to adapt authentically and a story as sprawling as “Conan the Cimmerian” would have some unique challenges. For all its faults, Conan the Barbarian was just as engrossing now as it was when I was a little Ghoul. 

• Directed By: John Milius
• Written By: Robert E. Howard. John Milius. Oliver Stone
• Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger. James Earl Jones. Max von Sydow

The Timing of a Hero

Released in 1982, Conan made his film debut during the Regan era. During the ‘80s, America was moving away from collective identity to focus on individualism. The focus was on the individual being responsible for their own success, regardless of what obstacles may be in their path.  Great in theory and for motivational speeches, not always realistic in practice. So many movie heroes of the time reflect this attitude, but Conan could be the poster boy. 

For the purposes of this review, we’re going to talk about “movie Conan”. “Book Conan” is a separate thing and worthy of much more in-depth analysis.  Movie Conan’s story starts as child. His father regales him with tales of the Riddle of Steel. This emphasizes how important his sword is to him and to his people. Soon after, the village is destroyed, and Conan is enslaved by cult leader Thulsa Doom. 

Conan’s Surval

Conan doesn’t just survive his brutal enslavement. It turns him into a man strong enough to become the top gladiator. This earns him a better life. It also gets him access to training, education, and a lot of women.  Eventually he becomes strong enough to earn his freedom. The phrasing of this in the movie is fantastic. Implying that his owner recognizes that Conan has become too powerful to keep captive for much longer, granting him his freedom has become the safest option.

Once Conan has his freedom, he sets his mind to revenge. He assembles a small group of equally motivated warriors to face off against Doom’s cannibal cult. Three lone warriors vs a large, hive-minded organization is pretty on-brand for reinforcing themes of individualism. 

Especially since it’s a cult that relies on brainwashing. The final confrontation is Conan freeing someone from the cult’s grasp, breaking their control.  The individual rising over the groupthink.  

All About Theme

There are also some cool moments in the final battle that touch on this theme as well. Remember, we started our heroes journey talking about the importance of steel. This is shown again, as Conan discovers legendary weapons and fights to regain his father’s sword. Well, in the end, the sword breaks. Conan is still victorious of course. This is because his journey has shown that it is the man that makes the weapon, not the other way around.  

I actually don’t want to spoil the final confrontation with Thulsa Doom. Yes, it’s old and it relies on some tropes. It’s also completely thematically relevant and true to character.

The 80’s and Today.

Thematically, you couldn’t ask for better messaging for the ‘80s.  Conan pulls himself up by his bootstraps and uses his rough environment to become tougher.  If he can do it, anyone can! Anyone vaguely Arnold Schwarzenegger-shaped anyway.  

Culturally, we’ve moved away from the idea that sheer willpower is enough to make things happen.  Our heroes these days are more grounded and even aware of their circumstances. Perhaps this is why fantasy films are a harder sell with audiences. But, there is still something alluring about the old-fashioned hero.  

We’ve seen a shift back towards a version of that hero lately. Not in fantasy stories, but Reacher is a pretty close, modern equivalent.  He’s more of a wandering hero, but in every story, he overcomes the disadvantages of his situation and uses his own individual strengths to defeat corrupt and evil organizations. Sometimes it’s with the help of a small group, but it’s always with a hot and equally capable woman. It’s modern pulp and I am here for it. 

But Ghoul, Conan is not a horror movie. 

That is true, but it was 3am in Indianapolis. My selection was limited. Plus, fantasy is horror-adjacent.  I also think it’s time for a GOOD Conan remake. Maybe Roman Reigns has some time to kill or something.  

Final Thoughts

Although he was created far before the ‘80s, Conan’s first movie highlights the values that were most important to the time. Unlike other movies of the generation, they’re still fairly relevant today. We still value the individual over the collective. Conan’s story will still resonate with audiences, even if the technical aspects of the film have aged a bit. 

Conan The Barbarian is available on streaming and occasionally on IFC.