One year before Robocop, Chopping Mall proved that robot-based security was a terrible idea. Both movies touch on some of the same themes: consumerism and overconsumption in the form of the retail excess that the ‘80s were known for, and the fear of new, emerging tech. These are common for the time period, but Chopping Mall’s more comedic take on the subject made this a cult classic.
- Directed by: Jim Wynorski
- Written by: Jim Wynorski. Steve Mitchell
- Starring: Kelli Maroney. Tony O’Dell. Russell Todd
Security robots designed to protect the top three levels of a mall, known as “protectors”, malfunction during a lightning storm and go on a killing spree. The execs responsible for the robots go to great lengths to explain how non-lethal they are. That’s how you know the body count is going to be high.
The Victims
Most of the victims are mall employees, which these days could make for a rather interesting movie, if someone wanted to remake this. But I’ll talk more about that later. They are they horniest mall employees ever, and as soon as the mall closes, set up shop in the furniture store for a “party”. All the archetypes are there: the bratty couple, the dumb ones, the tough couple, and the nerdy pair. Any guesses who the main characters are?
Yeah, cute and sweet geeks Ferdie and Alison. It’s not that the other characters are unlikeable, just that they don’t get the same level of character development. Which is fine, since they don’t make it to the third act anyway. Bait’s gonna bait.
What puts these deaths firmly in the “bait” category is how needless many of them are. Chopping Mall punishes the stupid, aggressively. Don’t leave the safety of your hiding spot ‘cause you miss your boyfriend.
I’m torn on how I feel about that last death in particular. I don’t mind that the character dies; it’s more that as she dies, her friends don’t or can’t do anything to help her. On one hand, they don’t even try, and all the cuts between the approaching robot and the helpless victim makes it seem like there is time to do something, anything. The part of this I like, is that it does sell how strange and intimidating these robots are to the young adults.
Is It a Slasher?
Maybe. Chopping Mall is categorized as a slasher. In a lot of ways, it behaves similarly to the slashers of the time. It leans heavily on some of the most popular tropes: horny teens get murdered in the order of their moral fiber.
The protectors certainly stalk the young adults through the locked-down, after-hours mall. They don’t move particularly fast, but they have a full arsenal of weapons. Thanks to their lasers, tazers, and pincers, the kills are interesting and varied.
If Chopping Mall hits on most of the sub-genre standards, why do I have such a hard time classifying it as a slasher? Having non-humanoid killers does throw me a bit, as does the light comedic tone.
The bright mall setting helps keep things light, even when heads are exploding. I don’t mind the tone since after all, none of these kids deserve to die. Chopping Mall doesn’t linger on their deaths. It even tempers them with the setting and moments of comedy.
What About That Remake?
This would be a pretty great time to remake Chopping Mall, if someone isn’t already. Mall attendance is down overall, and in my area, crime around the malls has gone up. Which would be good reason for a nice guard robot. A better reason, or a secondary reason, would be to supervise the productivity of the overnight workers responsible for stocking, security, or janitorial services.
You could build a theme around the willingness of corporations to ignore the risks to individuals in favor of profits, having a nameless, faceless board dismissing the reports of malfunctioning robots, or worse, calculating the loss of human life against the value of the property and goods. At the end of the movie, after the final girl and guy make it into the morning light, the board could be revealed to be blisteringly normal-looking people.
Uh Ghoul, that sounds like a much darker movie than the original Chopping Mall? Yeah, it does. Since the original was released, we’ve come to better understand the lengths corporations will go to either save money or boost value for stockholders. Any remake needs to reflect this deeper understanding.
This is the part of the dynamic that fascinates me, and why I would leave the board in shadows. For good or bad, just as they have dehumanized their employees, the tendency is to remove their humanity as well. It’s easy to say a corporation made these decisions that hurt so many, but that’s not the case. It is people causing so much suffering, not supervillains.
Final Thoughts
All of this is a long-winded way to say that Chopping Mall, for all its fun and ‘80s flair, is still so very relevant. Its focus is more on overconsumption, with the shots of the shoppers and stores. Overconsumption will probably always be important, but it’s a trendy topic, especially in times of economic uncertainty like these.
Chopping Mall is available on streaming and on Youtube.
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